A bride expressed her frustration after her father’s reaction to telling her father that she wanted to change a traditional aspect of her wedding wasn’t what she expected.
The debacle was initially posted to Reddit but later reposted on TikTok by a content creator named Shayla Harrington, who reads out Reddit submissions on her platform, and this latest story garnered a strong reaction from viewers.
The bride decided to walk herself down the aisle and got upset when her dad backed out of paying.
“My dad just decided he’s not gonna pay for my wedding anymore,” Harrington began reading from the bride’s Reddit post. The unnamed bride explained that during this entire wedding planning experience, she came to realize that if you allow your parents to pay for the ceremony, they want everything to be done their way.
This conclusion came after the bride informed her parents that she wanted the wedding to be done her way, which included walking herself down the aisle. She admitted that her parents raised her to be an “independent thinker,” and as someone who was raised with those values, she didn’t want to do every single wedding tradition on her big day.
She felt that in our modern world, women shouldn’t be considered the “property” of their fathers, and that meant eliminating the entire tradition of a father walking down the aisle and “giving away” his daughter. However, when her dad learned about it, he was incredibly unhappy.
“In his eyes, I’m taking away one of the most important parts of the day. Apparently, a first dance with my father wasn’t enough,” the bride continued. “My dad keeps going back to the point of; we’ve never treated you as property, why would you say that? He’s also trying to say that I’m discrediting everything he and my mom have done for me.”
Photo: Comstock Images / Canva Pro
To the bride, she felt her father’s point was completely unrelated to how she felt about the tradition, and wasn’t a fan of it to begin with. She felt that her dad was probably talking about this with some of his friends because he soon came back to her and claimed that if she refused to let him walk her down the aisle then he wouldn’t be paying for the ceremony.
“Which to me feels like, if you’re not gonna do your wedding the way I want, then I’m not gonna pay for it. That just doesn’t feel right to me,” she added. “Do we agree that my dad’s being a jerk right now? Really hoping he comes around because there’s no way I can afford this wedding if he doesn’t help me with it.”
In the comments section, some people felt the bride was wrong to cut her dad out of the ceremony.
“I don’t think fathers think you’re property and they’re giving you away as their property. I think that they feel walking you down the aisle is an honor,” one TikTok user wrote.
Another user suggested an alternative, writing, “I had my dad walk me but instead of saying who gives this woman to this man … they said who welcomes this man into their family and who welcomes this woman into theirs and both families said they do.”
“A marriage is nurtured by the love and support of its partners but also by the love and support of their families.”
A third user chimed in, “Being independent comes with adult responsibility. You want to change tradition, now the sole responsibility of paying for the wedding falls to you.”
There’s always room for compromise and new traditions.
If this bride is determined to walk down the aisle by herself, there is nothing wrong with wanting to do that. But, if she still wants her father to pay for the ceremony, then the best plan of action is to have a heart-to-heart, where both she and her dad can express their feelings without judgment or interruptions.
It’s important that not only she tries to get her dad to understand her feelings, but also that she understands his disappointment as well. Through a conversation, the bride and her father may be able to come to a compromise, or even consider alternative traditional aspects that they both feel strongly about and are meaningful to them and their relationship.
Nia Tipton is a Chicago-based entertainment, news, and lifestyle writer whose work delves into modern-day issues and experiences.